Category: homeless

What could we all do to help the homeless population in this country? I think it’s a big issue.

A tramp stopped me in the street and asked if I had any loose change. I jiggled my trouser pocket and said, “It appears that I do.” I thanked him for his interest and walked on

I’ve been down on my luck recently and ended up living in the windmill at a crazy golf course. The owner keeps trying to move me, but I’m staying putt.

I saw two homeless people kissing the other day. I said, “get a room.”

Where do you find a homeless women? In the soup kitchen

People say that I’m not very charitable. Usually the homeless after I punch them.

For sale: tumble dryer, sleeps one.

I asked a pretty, young, homeless woman if I could take her home, and she said yes with a big smile. The look on her face soon changed when I walked off with her cardboard box.

I’m surprised all the homeless people don’t rob as much as they do. If they get away with it great, if not they end up inside. It’s a win win situation.

I don’t know why, but on the London underground all the dogs seem to have pet tramps.

I saw in the news today that the Russian government has introduced a new program to deal with the problem of homeless people in the Moscow area. They call it “winter”.

I used to like the clean-shaven look, but my new beard is growing on me!

Tramps…when given ‘change for a cuppa’ why not put it towards a kettle and teabags. Its far more economical long term.

I was walking through the park and I saw an old guy doing Tai Chi. I watched him for a while, marvelling at his moves. Only when I got closer did I see it was a tramp trying to put on his coat.

How can you tell if a begger is faking it for the money? Tell them a knock knock joke and see if they answer.