Category: history

That’s me off to Germany on holiday; Superior beer and overall a more superior people. Well, according to this 1936 tour guide.

Why are the all the best tales and moments of the past known as History? Because we have no reason to pay attention to her-story..

They say that History never repeats itself, That’s probably because I delete it before it has a chance to,

The Costa Concordia disaster appears to have been caused by the captain failing to turn in time. Strange that. The Italians turned very quickly in World War II.

I like queuing, my dad likes queuing, my grandad loved queuing. What I’m saying is I come from a long line of people who like queuing.

I’ve been fired because I set my standards too high. I’m gutted, I loved working at The Battle of Bosworth site.

I plan to celebrate Columbus day this year by walking into a stranger’s house and telling them that I live there now.

On a scale of 0 to Anne Boleyn how off your head were you last night?

Zeus sent women to be a punishment for men, they were a nuisance so men couldn’t live with them but they were dependant so men couldn’t live without them. At least they got one thing right

My wife just left me because of my apparent obsession with Tudor times. However, I got the last laugh. I shat on her out of the window when she was leaving.

If history has taught us anything, it’s about things that happened in the past.

I’m not saying the wife buys too many shoes, but people keep mistaking our house for a Holocaust museum.

All these anti-semetic jokes are disgusting. Anne Frank will be spinning in her oven.

All castles had one major weakness. The enemy used to get in through the gift shop.

In 2000 years time, historians studying the national census will think we murdered all the Jedi.