Category: food and drink

I bought some dry roasted peanuts from Tesco. I looked at the packet and it said “Warning. Contains Nuts”. Luckily, this prevented me from eating them and going into anaphylactic shock due to my severe nut allergy. My lactose intolerant friend wasn’t so lucky, as the half pint of milk he bought from Tesco outrageously […]

Ocean Spray – Good Taste from a Good Place… It’s sour and American, am I missing something?

I’m experiencing that ‘lovely warm feeling inside’ you get when you’ve done a selfless good deed for someone. I gave up a whole day to help my mate drink his litre bottle of Brandy.

Joe leaves his house at 3.50 am, with 17.60 in his pocket. He arrives at the all-night garage at 3.57 am, and buys the following; 8 Kit-Kats, at 40 pence each 2 tubes of Pringles, at 1.65 each 3 Pepperami Firesticks, at 70 pence each 2 Litre bottles of Ginger Ale, at 1.19 each Now; […]

The staff in McDonald’s aren’t allowed to wear rings on their fingers. It’s not a hygiene thing – it’s so they don’t scratch the floor tiles when they knuckle drag.

I was opening the jar and then … JAM!

My delivery of herbs has just arrived and I can now make my main course The thyme has come…

If McDonald’s were to lower the cost of a cheeseburger by just 1p, they would double the amount of money they give away to charity each year.

My new job would be going well if not for the friction developing between me and and my co-workers, due to the fact of me refusing to costantly make the coffee. Still, I’d quite like to keep the job at Starbucks as it pay’s pretty good.

I swear to god, one day I will have my revenge. One day it’ll be the onion crying.

I love having my dinner on my lap in front of the telly. It means I don’t have to wash up a plate, but soup is a nightmare.

Head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes. And eyes and ears and mouth and nose. Head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes. A fun children’s song, and also the ingredients of a Big Mac.

My mate never knows which herb to cook with. Despite me telling him, thyme and thyme again.

Carlsberg don’t do great tasting beers, But if they did….

I have just made my first Sticky Toffee Pudding. Well it was supposed to be just a Toffee Pudding but I got a bit over excited.