Category: food and drink

To me fish counters at supermarkets are just colder, sadder aquariums.

Sky News : “Two Million Dead Fish Found In Maryland” Well, that’s me off the cookies for a few months.

I cracked open one of my boiled eggs this morning to find a half developed chick inside. It was absolutely disgusting, it didn’t even taste anything like chicken.

Supersize Vs Superskinny, My money’s on the supersize.

Fat people, its not their fault. They just have slow metabolisms. And very fast, chip eating hands.

I was in Sunderland the other day and went to a quiet back street restaurant that served lovely sushi at a tenth of the price that they do in London. I asked them how they could afford to sell it so cheap and the manager said that prices would rise back to normal as soon […]

I was with my mate in the pub earlier. I said, “For this time of year the weather is quite, ummm …” “Mild?” he volunteered. “Cheers mate. I’ll have a bag of crisps as well.”

I’m not sure why they always have skinny people in those McDonalds adverts. They’re not fooling anyone.

I just saw the KFC commercial where a man is surrounded by blacks, and looks scared. To put them in a good mood, he pulls out a bucket of fried chicken. I see that whoever directs KFC commercials is a Sickipedian.

If bars won’t serve drunk people, why does McDonald’s serve fat people?

I was recently fired from my job at the OXO factory. I was eating all of the stock.

I admitted to the wife that I often buy cheap lager and drink drive home from work. “have you no respect, what if you got caught?” she shouted. I spose she has a point, from Monday I’m gonna buy the expensive stuff.

Where does Extra Extra Virgin Olive Oil come from ? Really ugly olives

Rumour has it, Fish is Good for you. Tell that to my wife when it comes to foreplay.

Apparently losing weight can help boost your memory. Oh no! I’ve just remembered how much I like pies.