Category: family

My wife says I’m a pessimist and should stop being so negative all the time. God I have so many flaws.

I explained to the girl as gently as I could that I didn’t want to continue our relationship and I couldn’t see us going anywhere. There wasn’t anyone else involved but I just didn’t love her anymore and I wanted her to move out of my house. I felt a bit guilty but I knew […]

I told my family about this website…now none of them are speaking to me.

My Mum recently got divorced and married a guy in a wheelchair. Do I still call him my step dad?

A farmer and his wife had worked hard, scrimped and saved to send their son to college. As soon as he had enrolled, he started to grow a beard. Next he grew a large moustache and sideburns. Being pleased with his hairy face, he had his photo taken and sent it off to his parents. […]

I was asked the question, “What would you rather be, blind or deaf?” I answered deaf, my wife is pretty hot but her voice does my head in.

I was driving along the road the other day when I saw a man trying to run his wife down in his car. I was going to stop to help but he looked like he had it under control

Im a real family man Im loyal to to all eight of my familes.

I want to be just like my dad… … and not have any children.

I treat my radiator and daughter the same. I bleed them regularly.

I’ve made quite a few mistakes in my life. The Child Support Agency kindly send me letters to remind me.

Went on a pleasure trip last weekend. Drove my mother-in-law to the airport.

An argument recently overheard in a primary school playground. “Your Mum’s like a double decker bus… there’s always room for one more on top.” “Yeah, well YOUR MUM’S like a double decker… she only costs a pound to ride and kids under five go free.”

It’s amazing how having a baby can change some people. My wife used to be quite attractive.

I remember i once went to see my nan as a little boy. The trainers with the lights in the heel were cool, but the spongebob dungarees didnt suit her.