BBC Radio Five Live : Ash …
BBC Radio Five Live : Ashes Breakfast With my wife’s cooking, I get one of those every morning.
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Describe myself in 4 word …
Describe myself in 4 words? Bad at counting.
Continue ReadingMy Grandad has re-invente …
My Grandad has re-invented the rocking chair. It rocks forward rather than backwards. It allows him to feign interest in people’s conversations.
Continue Reading“You are what you eat” sh …
“You are what you eat” should only apply to cannibals.
Continue ReadingI’ve just finished a cour …
I’ve just finished a course on lockpicking. It’s really opened doors for me.
Continue ReadingI just got employed as a …
I just got employed as a human lie detector The pays not great but at least I can make an honest buck
Continue ReadingI found a Land Rover buri …
I found a Land Rover buried in one of my fields. It was a nice Discovery.
Continue ReadingI’ve got a date tonight w …
I’ve got a date tonight with a girl I met online.She says she is a TV girl, and I love my soaps, so we should hit it off straight away.
Continue ReadingFrench authorities have d …
French authorities have discovered that it is not the real Mona Lisa displayed in the Louvre.. It’s just a painting of her.
Continue ReadingThat’s out of …
That’s out of line. way
Continue ReadingI’ve just read the heartw …
I’ve just read the heartwarming story of a dog’s quest to win a game of musical statues, and the one flaw that stopped him achieving that goal. It was a moving tail.
Continue ReadingI was talking to this arc …
I was talking to this architect who had his house-maid backwards so he could watch TV at the same time…..
Continue ReadingOur local Neighbourhood W …
Our local Neighbourhood Watch is so annoying. It has a loud ring that wakes me up at early hours of the day.
Continue ReadingMe and my mate reverse ou …
Me and my mate reverse our cars everywhere together. We go back a long way.
Continue ReadingUnexploded bombs – Carlsb …
Unexploded bombs – Carlsberg don’t do war memorials…
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