I recently bought one of …
I recently bought one of those Viera 3D TV’s. The screen is much blacker than on the Bergkamp and Pires models
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What do you call a restau …
What do you call a restaurant manager from Leeds? Ed Chef
Continue ReadingYou know you got issues w …
You know you got issues when your mother comes top on your Facebook stalkers.
Continue ReadingMy landlord blames me for …
My landlord blames me for allowing a mouse infestation but I’ve been allowed to stay after promising to sort the problem out. I hope mice are as scared of rats as I think they will be.
Continue ReadingWhat’s wetter and sloppie …
What’s wetter and sloppier than a French Kiss? The Golly Wog Snog.
Continue ReadingOn an Inside Xbox video a …
On an Inside Xbox video about Kinect and the microphone, the girl at the end talks about how she can use the xbox from the kitchen. Irony.
Continue ReadingI threw open the doors of …
I threw open the doors of the Lamborghini owners convention and shouted- ”I came in a Lamborghini!!” A rather posh looking bloke came up to me and said- ”Sir, we all did, and I think you mean ARRIVED in a Lamborghini” ”No” I replied, ”I meant came. One of you idiots left your window down […]
Continue ReadingJust got an email from Ga …
Just got an email from GameStop about a new “Black Friday” deal Buy nothing, take anything?
Continue ReadingWhat do you get if you cr …
What do you get if you cross a newsreader and a board game? Natasha Kerplunksky
Continue ReadingExternal stimulation of b …
External stimulation of brainwave patterns. Makes you think, doesn’t it?
Continue ReadingYou know you’re going to …
You know you’re going to be unemployed for life when you can’t get a job as a volunteer at a Charity Shop
Continue ReadingI used to have bad luck w …
I used to have bad luck with my DJ’ing equipment. But now, finally, the tables have turned.
Continue ReadingI started dating this dis …
I started dating this disabled girl, both for her personality… And the fact that she can’t run away.
Continue ReadingThey say its bad luck for …
They say its bad luck for the groom to see the bride on the morning of the wedding day. I said to my wife ”Thats weird, I dont remember seeing you in the morning”
Continue ReadingI took my new girlfriend …
I took my new girlfriend to the cinema last night, we sat at the back… There’s less chance of people seeing us together.
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