What’s the difference bet …
What’s the difference between you and your mum? Your mum is trying to diet…
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I’m so tired. The wife wo …
I’m so tired. The wife woke me at 2am saying she could hear someone downstairs! Stupid Woman. Of course she could, we live on the fifth floor of a block of flats.
Continue ReadingAfter very nearly failing …
After very nearly failing to perform in bed last night, the wife said she’d pop to the Internet Cafe and research erectile dysfunction. If I went wither.
Continue ReadingYou can find your way ont …
You can find your way onto the underground fighting scene if you look hard enough.
Continue ReadingJust finished my first sh …
Just finished my first shift as a croupier at a casino. Dealt with everything quite well.
Continue ReadingResearch into to male eja …
Research into to male ejaculatory pressure was abandoned due to poor and unpredictable recruitment. They only came in dribs and drabs.
Continue ReadingGive a man a fish and you …
Give a man a fish and you’ll feed him for that day. Teach a man to fish and then sell him all your old and unwanted fishing tackle.
Continue ReadingOsama was found today: ta …
Osama was found today: talk Abbotabad place to hide!
Continue ReadingYou gotta feel sorry for …
You gotta feel sorry for bees. How unlucky can you get? Black AND Ginger.
Continue ReadingWhy didn’t the chicken cr …
Why didn’t the chicken cross the road? Because it was chicken
Continue ReadingI must have been about 15 …
I must have been about 15 the first time I went to the pub. I ordered vodka and couldn’t believe I was getting served. The trouble started when the barman asked me what I wanted in it. Naively, I said “Milk and two sugars”.
Continue ReadingI was talking with all th …
I was talking with all the grunts in the army when a sergeant major came up asking what we were discussing. I replied “Excuse me but this is a private conversation.”
Continue ReadingI taught myself to drive …
I taught myself to drive by playing racing games on the Playstation. I’m pretty good at it, I’ve got loads of points on my licence.
Continue ReadingJust planted a few bulbs. …
Just planted a few bulbs. Gonna have my own solar plant!
Continue ReadingThe wife asked me to shar …
The wife asked me to share some of the different types of beer I’d brought back from the supermarket. She got my special bruise.
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