I dont know about you guy …
I dont know about you guys but With the ability to spell difficult words such as connoisseur, manoeuvre and conscientiously, I’m seriously thinking about entering a spelling competishon.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I’ve just started a conga …
I’ve just started a conga on Twitter. I got 342,053 followers.
Continue ReadingIf my girlfriend got preg …
If my girlfriend got pregnant, I’d have to run out and get some coat hangers. Need something to hang all those cute little baby outfits on!
Continue ReadingI never understood why an …
I never understood why anyone would put “It’s complicated” under their relationship status on facebook. After going on Raoul Moat’s facebook page i now understand
Continue Reading“You have a very sick min …
“You have a very sick mind.” “Yeah,” I grinned, “A few people have told me that.” “No. I mean you have an inoperable brain tumour,” said the neurosurgeon.
Continue ReadingScrambled eggs does sound …
Scrambled eggs does sound a lot more appetising that crushed chicken’s periods.
Continue ReadingMy son is devastated beca …
My son is devastated because his hamster died after I washed it in soap powder. I don’t think the soap powder killed it, though… …it was probably the 800rpm spin cycle .
Continue ReadingAt the D-Day commemoratio …
At the D-Day commemorations, it appeared Gordon Brown did not know the words to the national anthem, which commentators have noted will cause uproar. I think this is definitely an overreaction, he’s been doing such a good job until this.
Continue ReadingAt least I’ve had somethi …
At least I’ve had something go down on me, today.
Continue ReadingScooping your boxer short …
Scooping your boxer shorts up off the bedroom floor with your feet and effortlessly catching them in your hand, thinking you should be in the Barcelona starting 11…. You know you’ve done it.
Continue ReadingI saw a snail begging out …
I saw a snail begging outside of Sainsbury’s today… Although it was hard to tell if it was a homeless snail, or just a cunning slug.
Continue ReadingI went to the doctor abou …
I went to the doctor about my persistent laughter. He gave me some pills but I was laughing so hard I spat them back out. He frowned and said, ‘You need to take them seriously for them to work.’
Continue ReadingI’m considering taking ou …
I’m considering taking out a superinjuction I’m not quite sure what they are but I have noticed how a lot of people who have taken them out receive a lot of interest on twitter.
Continue ReadingI rang my friend up earli …
I rang my friend up earlier with my iphone 4. i thought hang on a minute…
Continue ReadingA guy had broken down out …
A guy had broken down outside my house and knocked on my door. He said, “Excuse me, sorry to bother you but I don’t suppose you’ve got anything I can jump my car with?” I said, “Sure.” And went inside. He had a bemused look on his face when I came back, I don’t think […]
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