Painting your Front Door? …
Painting your Front Door? Tip for the day, Don’t Knock it til you’ve dried it.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
There’s actually a really …
There’s actually a really quick way to tell if your house is haunted. It isn’t.
Continue ReadingSave on the cost of a Com …
Save on the cost of a Comic Relief red nose by using the same one from last year.
Continue ReadingI’m trying to build up th …
I’m trying to build up the courage today to tell my pets they are adopted
Continue ReadingI don’t think it’s fair f …
I don’t think it’s fair for my wife to call me immature. Fair enough, I did purposely buy the same telly as my neighbours so I could stand outside their house and change their channels with my remote, but who doesn’t?
Continue ReadingThat sign in public toile …
That sign in public toilets that reads “Please leave this bathroom as you found it.” confused me for years. Until my boss pointed out that it’s not applicable to the cleaner.
Continue ReadingStaying at a B&B theres t …
Staying at a B&B theres that awkward feeling, your in somebody’s home, like your mates house, his parents are there… but he’s dead.
Continue Reading“One man’s rubbish is ano …
“One man’s rubbish is another man’s treasure,” is an awesome phrase. But it’s a horrible way to tell your kid they’re adopted.
Continue ReadingMy dad once said to me, …
My dad once said to me, “Don’t quote other people’s advice.”
Continue ReadingMy first day as an auctio …
My first day as an auctioneer went very well. I sold lots.
Continue Readingsome dwarf started on me …
some dwarf started on me in the pub earlier for absoloutly no reason at all. so I squared up to him to show I was the bigger man.
Continue ReadingI keep seeing all this st …
I keep seeing all this stuff on the news about “Rio 2016”. Surely he will have retired by then?
Continue ReadingSo the back of this guy’s …
So the back of this guy’s anorak was leaping up and down, and people were chucking money to him. I said, ‘do you earn a living doing that?’ He said, ‘yes, this is my livelihood.’
Continue ReadingPlaying Chinese Whispers …
Playing Chinese Whispers at the Town Cryer’s convention was doomed from the outset.
Continue ReadingMy room-mate woke me up i …
My room-mate woke me up in the middle of the night with his sack in my face. I was bolloxed.
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