I went to Morocco on holi …
I went to Morocco on holiday. I visited one of the markets and bought a toilet roll holder. Some call it extravagant, others slavery, but Mohammed loves his new job.
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London 2012 Olympic; prom …
London 2012 Olympic; promoting healthy living by being sponsored by McDonald’s, Coca Cola and Cadbury’s Welcome to England everybody.
Continue ReadingA Jew’s favourite method …
A Jew’s favourite method of transport Israel.
Continue ReadingGooglemail just sent me a …
Googlemail just sent me an email saying I might be having problems receiving emails. Well that’s clearly not right.
Continue ReadingFool guests into thinking …
Fool guests into thinking all your picture frames are digital by changing the picture yourself every 15 seconds.
Continue ReadingMy 10 year old son came u …
My 10 year old son came up to me today and asked ” daddy i hate it when I go to the toilet and my willie dangles in the water at the botom” man I need a DNA test .
Continue ReadingIf Carlsberg actually did …
If Carlsberg actually did ‘something,’ then that would be brilliant.
Continue ReadingI saw my neighbor earlier …
I saw my neighbor earlier who had a brand new dog with her. “That’s a fine looking creature miss, bulldog is it?” I asked. She said “Yes that’s right, you can give him a pet if you want”. So I went and fetched my daughters hamster.
Continue ReadingMy mate just asked, “What …
My mate just asked, “What’s the best way to pick up a woman?” I said, “Bend your knees and keep your back straight.”
Continue ReadingI got a grant from my loc …
I got a grant from my local school today. And a Chris, and a Justin.
Continue ReadingDon’t you just hate it wh …
Don’t you just hate it when people think there clever but use the wrong grammar?
Continue ReadingBomb disposal experts’ wi …
Bomb disposal experts’ wives. Keep your hubby on his toes by packing his lunchbox with plasticine and an old alarm clock.
Continue ReadingWhat’s orange and sounds …
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
Continue ReadingNever drink coffee in the …
Never drink coffee in the middle of the day at work I tried it once and it kept me awake all afternoon!
Continue ReadingJust wrote a story about …
Just wrote a story about a bloke that drank a pint of Boddingtons and spewed up. It’s a rough draught.
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