You’ve heard of quack and …
You’ve heard of quack and croakaine. But what gets lizards high? Mariguana.
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What is it about Ice Crea …
What is it about Ice Cream Van Drivers that makes them so poor at drawing cartoons?
Continue ReadingMy mate has lost both arm …
My mate has lost both arms in a car crash. I can’t even imagine how he’s feeling.
Continue ReadingI love a girl with a trim …
I love a girl with a trimmed bush because it makes it easier to see into her window at night.
Continue ReadingDuck pluckers get me down …
Duck pluckers get me down.
Continue ReadingA Blood and a Crip walk i …
A Blood and a Crip walk into a supermarket… They got beef
Continue ReadingI applied for a job as a …
I applied for a job as a lumberjack, but the post was axed.
Continue ReadingWhat do you call a sleepi …
What do you call a sleeping fish? A Kipper
Continue ReadingMy friend said I could sa …
My friend said I could save a bit of money by going to Iceland for my grocery shopping. I hope he’s right, the plane ticket cost a fortune.
Continue ReadingI have invented a door ma …
I have invented a door made entirely from seeds that opens by voice command. “Open Sesame”
Continue Reading“BREAKING NEWS” :- Man dr …
“BREAKING NEWS” :- Man drops plate.
Continue ReadingAfter seeing those cute p …
After seeing those cute puppies on the andrex advert, I decided to get the kids one for Christmas. I can’t wait to see their excited little faces when they open up their extra-soft toilet roll.
Continue ReadingJust landed after a 24 ho …
Just landed after a 24 hour flight back from Australia. Tomorrow was a really long day.
Continue ReadingConvicted criminals run i …
Convicted criminals run in my family.
Continue ReadingShark attack: ‘This was a …
Shark attack: ‘This was a rogue shark’ Unlike those friendly ones.
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