There’s me thinking I was …
There’s me thinking I was being a good guy, donating blood. But apparently my wife’s period in a flask is unacceptable.
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Do sperm banks make a goo …
Do sperm banks make a good profit income?
Continue ReadingMy boss told me that if I …
My boss told me that if I keep coming into work late, I’m going to be looking at Dismissal. I’m just wondering how Starbucks acquired a WMD.
Continue ReadingMy wife just said to me ” …
My wife just said to me “The birth of a child is the most exciting moment of any parents life.” Clearly, jumping in a cab and shouting “FOLLOW THAT CAR !” has never crossed her mind.
Continue ReadingUse the best when it come …
Use the best when it comes to computers! Apple for graphics Palm for mobility Linux for servers Windows for solitaire
Continue ReadingWhenever I see Simon Cowe …
Whenever I see Simon Cowell, Louis Walsh, Dannii Minogue and Cheryl Cole, it makes me wish I had a job as a panel beater.
Continue ReadingMy boss has threatened to …
My boss has threatened to give me the sack for being on Sickipedia too long… I usually only have to swallow the first few inches.
Continue ReadingIf a book on failure does …
If a book on failure doesn’t sell well, has it been a success?
Continue ReadingWent to a traditional Fre …
Went to a traditional French restaurant for dinner last night. I had Shergar for starters, Desert Orchid for main and Red Rum for dessert. It was very much a case of horses for courses.
Continue ReadingI went to the zoo and saw …
I went to the zoo and saw a loaf in a cage. A sign read: “Bread in captivity.”
Continue ReadingDyslexic IT technicians w …
Dyslexic IT technicians wait ages for a USB. Then three come along at once.
Continue ReadingAfter just having both my …
After just having both my hands amputated, i was trying to think what felt different. I just couldnt put my finger on it.
Continue ReadingThe driving instructor sa …
The driving instructor said “I’d like you to put your foot down.” “But its a 30mph zone…” I queried. “I’m referring to the foot hanging out of the window,” he replied.
Continue ReadingI’m special with a capita …
I’m special with a capital R.
Continue ReadingWhen I asked my wife why …
When I asked my wife why she had trouble sleeping, she said I wouldn’t understand about hormones. I understand perfectly. I cant get to sleep when that hormones.
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