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I used to go out with an …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I used to go out with an …

I used to go out with an Olympic hurdler. But she got over me.

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A Chinese horse walked i …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on A Chinese horse walked i …

A Chinese horse walked into a bar and the barman said “why the long face’ The horse said, “you must have the long eyes because this is the light face’

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I can’t be the only one t …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I can’t be the only one t …

I can’t be the only one that is going to drive my car at 88 mph at 01:59.59 this morning.

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I went into Sainsbury’s a …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I went into Sainsbury’s a …

I went into Sainsbury’s and asked, “Do you sell spinal vertebrae?” The guy said, “They’re in the back.”

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When my wife came home I …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on When my wife came home I …

When my wife came home I spoke to her about our son. “His heads all messed up,” I said. “He’s a teenager… They’re all a bit like that.” She replied. “No. The police just called.. He’s shot himself in school.”

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Postman falls into coma.. …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Postman falls into coma.. …

Postman falls into coma… Letters pray.

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I converted my Nail bed i …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I converted my Nail bed i …

I converted my Nail bed into a door earlier. I tell you what, you can’t knock it.

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My wife says she is sick …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on My wife says she is sick …

My wife says she is sick to death of me taking advantage of her. Ive consequently told her to find someone else to play tennis with.

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When I was a kid I wanted …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on When I was a kid I wanted …

When I was a kid I wanted to be a history teacher but when I got older I realised there was no future in it.

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Was Einsteins theory good …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Was Einsteins theory good …

Was Einsteins theory good? Relatively.

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My friend said he was goi …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on My friend said he was goi …

My friend said he was going to create an invisibility cloak. I don’t see it working though

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I was cleaning my house t …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I was cleaning my house t …

I was cleaning my house this morning using a latino and a tinned ham. My house is spic ‘n’ spam now.

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My wife said I was too fo …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on My wife said I was too fo …

My wife said I was too formal. I suggested she put that in writing and I’d reply by return of post.

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Generally speaking, peopl …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Generally speaking, peopl …

Generally speaking, people named Aaron have really lazy parents.

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I was going to write a st …

December 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I was going to write a st …

I was going to write a story about the march I went on at the weekend but I can’t. I’ve got rioters block.

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