I used to go out with an …
I used to go out with an Olympic hurdler. But she got over me.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
A Chinese horse walked i …
A Chinese horse walked into a bar and the barman said “why the long face’ The horse said, “you must have the long eyes because this is the light face’
Continue ReadingI can’t be the only one t …
I can’t be the only one that is going to drive my car at 88 mph at 01:59.59 this morning.
Continue ReadingI went into Sainsbury’s a …
I went into Sainsbury’s and asked, “Do you sell spinal vertebrae?” The guy said, “They’re in the back.”
Continue ReadingWhen my wife came home I …
When my wife came home I spoke to her about our son. “His heads all messed up,” I said. “He’s a teenager… They’re all a bit like that.” She replied. “No. The police just called.. He’s shot himself in school.”
Continue ReadingPostman falls into coma.. …
Postman falls into coma… Letters pray.
Continue ReadingI converted my Nail bed i …
I converted my Nail bed into a door earlier. I tell you what, you can’t knock it.
Continue ReadingMy wife says she is sick …
My wife says she is sick to death of me taking advantage of her. Ive consequently told her to find someone else to play tennis with.
Continue ReadingWhen I was a kid I wanted …
When I was a kid I wanted to be a history teacher but when I got older I realised there was no future in it.
Continue ReadingWas Einsteins theory good …
Was Einsteins theory good? Relatively.
Continue ReadingMy friend said he was goi …
My friend said he was going to create an invisibility cloak. I don’t see it working though
Continue ReadingI was cleaning my house t …
I was cleaning my house this morning using a latino and a tinned ham. My house is spic ‘n’ spam now.
Continue ReadingMy wife said I was too fo …
My wife said I was too formal. I suggested she put that in writing and I’d reply by return of post.
Continue ReadingGenerally speaking, peopl …
Generally speaking, people named Aaron have really lazy parents.
Continue ReadingI was going to write a st …
I was going to write a story about the march I went on at the weekend but I can’t. I’ve got rioters block.
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