Category: wordplay

Nostalgia. It’s not what it used to be.

I will not take my wife’s insults on me being lazy lying down.

A fresh Al Qaeda bomb plot has been foiled by the metropolitan police. Which is probably what kept it fresh in the first place.

I keep dropping things. It’s getting out of hand.

Mannequins are model citizens

I got arrested yesterday for stealing hay from a farmer. I’ve been refused bale.

What do mexicans put on their skin? Olay!

I’m good at playing on words, probably because I keep writing on the floor.

Saw a really bright star tonight. My wife said it was called the Dog Star. I thought “can’t be Sirius”.

Newsflash: Ex Cambodian leader accused of hurling racist abuse at cows. That’s the Pot calling the cattle black.

I was given life in prison today. That sure cheered me up, I love David Attenborough.

After a sudden change in events, the dictator had to suddenly revise his plans for world domination. He spent the next week in the library.

Welcome back to the world ironing championship where the drama is unfolding.

Last week I decided to read the dictionary. It didn’t take me long, after 5 chapters I had already reached the end.

For sale. Modified DeLorean DMC-12. No timewasters.