qjoq.com – Page 1224

I’m not a big talker. My …

February 11qjoq.comLeave a Comment

I’m not a big talker. My girlfriend only has to look in the mirror to know if she’s done something wrong…

If it is tourist season, …

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If it is tourist season, why can’t we shoot them?

I woke up in the Police s …

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I woke up in the Police station this morning with no memory of the previous night. I really need to stop drinking on duty.

I bought a tennis racket …

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I bought a tennis racket today. It’s a C.D. of the Williams sisters grunting.

A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter. Mother: “What does the cow say?” Child: “Moooo!” Mother: “Great! What does the cat say?” Child: “Meow.” Mother: “Oh, you’re so smart! What does the frog say?” And this wide-eyed little three-year-old looked up at her mother and replied, “Bud.”

My wife was furious when …

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My wife was furious when she discovered that Macauley Culkin was going to be staying with us for a few days. Particularly when the paint tin smashed into her teeth at the front door.

I recently traced my fami …

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I recently traced my family tree… It was easier, I’m rubbish at drawing.

“Try walking in my shoes” …

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“Try walking in my shoes” said the clown.

I knew that insects were …

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I knew that insects were considered a delicacy in some countries but I never appreciated it myself until I went to Bangkok and was served a Big Mac and flies.