There's actually a really quick way to tell if your house is haunted.
It isn't.

Submitted by: nila

"Serial Killer" is a bit strong.
I prefer the term "Ghost Manufacturer"

Submitted by: nila

Walking home last night I saw a dead baby ghost on the pavement...
Although on reflection it could have been a handkerchief.

Submitted by: nila

Son: Are ghosts real?
Dad: Of course not.
Son: But the maid said they are.
Dad: Son pack your bags....we don't have a maid

Submitted by: nila

I always test psychics with a knock knock joke.
If they say "Who's there?" I get up and leave.

Submitted by: nila

My mate just came round looking like he'd seen a ghost.
"I just had a seance on my own," he whispered.
"I know," I replied. "You've ouija self."

Submitted by: nila

What do you call it when a ghost comes in and steals all of your stuff?
Paranormal Blacktivity.

Submitted by: nila

I was recently noticing strange happenings in the home, I'd wake up and furniture had moved, lights were on, and many other different strange things. My mate referred me to an exorcist, now, I didn't believe in the idea he could do anything but, I was willing to try anything.
To my surprise, he was completely successful, and i've had nothing strange happen, however..
A bill came through the door for 2,500.. I had no chance of paying this! I rang the exorcist up to try and sort something out, but nothing could be done so, hes coming down tomorrow to repossess the house.

Submitted by: nila

I thought I'd seen the ghost of my dead girlfriend the other day. I walked into my lounge and she was just floating there, all pale and cold looking.
Turns out she'd hung herself earlier from a beam in the ceiling and I'd forgotten to take her down.

Submitted by: nila

Very interesting thing, the paranormal.
I have a book on it.
I didn't buy it, it just turned up in my room one day.

Submitted by: nila

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