Why do women make sandwic …
Why do women make sandwiches? Because they’re bread for it.
Continue ReadingWhy do women make sandwiches? Because they’re bread for it.
Continue ReadingI’m not saying Adele is fat as such – just that I recently heard a rumor that Pop ‘N Fresh has a poster of her on his kitchen wall for inspiration
Continue ReadingCondoms are like parents… they are there to protect you, but usually it’s more fun when they’re not around.
Continue ReadingI saw my ex pushing a baby down the street today. We stopped, she nodded at the pushchair and said, “It’s yours.” I said, “Oh my God… really?” She said, “Yeah, really.” So I picked up the baby, threw it on the floor and walked away with my new set of wheels.
Continue ReadingLast night I thought my feet were hanging out the end of the bed, So I got out to have a look.
Continue ReadingPanorama; advertising pirate bay and vuze… its like the police giving out free drugs
Continue ReadingI’ve just woke up to the news that my next door neighbour has strangled his wife, killed his two kids and hung himself. I’m shocked to the core and absolutely gutted. I was going to borrow his barbecue today.
Continue ReadingThose children in Africa think they are poor? When I was a kid, I didn’t have enough money to buy a memory card for my Playstation 1.
Continue ReadingThis time last year I weighed nine stones… I don’t know why I just wanted to weigh them.
Continue ReadingMy blood test results said my blood had zero antigens. I thought that must be a typo.
Continue ReadingAfter taking 3 hits of meth, I ran around in circles for 10 minutes before finally throwing up on girl #3 who then burst into tears. I’m pretty sure I’m done with speed dating.
Continue ReadingTink my postmn is a thif My leters keep gong misin
Continue ReadingThe wife found a lump, and went to the doctor……………………..and the breast is history.
Continue ReadingLady Gaga’s lyrics are so obscure. I think she has hidden a gender.
Continue ReadingI suffer from bi-polar disorder. My house in Antarctica is even messier than the one on the North Pole.
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