| Joke Name |
• F-A-R-M
How does a blonde spell "farm?" |
• This Farm Boy Goes Into a Whorehouse...
A farm boy who had just finished his schooling on the farm, was sent by his Ma and Pa to the big city to go to college. The first thing the boy does when he gets to town, is go to find a whorehouse. He goes inside to talk to the madam about... |
• Paul F. Tompkins: Migrant Farm-Worker Fantasy Camp
Let's say you did some migrant working in college, right? And you thought you were pretty good, you could have turned pro, but then, I don't know, you broke your leg or whatever. This is your chance to work alongside the greats of migrant... |
• Farm Fugitives
A Welshman, an Englishman and a Irishman were being chased by Farmer Giles with a shotgun. After 10 minutes of running they spotted a barn and ran inside. |
• Incest Farm
What do you call an incestuous nephew? |
• Frenchman and Farm Animals
What do you call a Frenchman with a sheep under one arm and a goat under the other? |
• Retta: Two Words That Shouldn't Describe the Same Product
Think about it: nondairy creamer, two words that should not be used to describe the same product. Kind of like turkey bacon -- what the hell is going on on that farm? |
• Gene Pompa: Hardcore Political Activist
I'm an old school, hardcore political activist. For instance, I still won't eat grapes because of the plight of the migrant farm workers. I also won't eat raisins because of the older migrant farm workers. That's how hardcore I am. I also won't eat prunes. That's for a completely different reason. |
• Grandpa Gets Off
A young boy was visiting his grandfather's farm when one day he walks out behind the barn and sees his grandfather playing with himself. The boy says, "What are you doing grandpa, jacking off?" Grandpa replies, "No sonny, just jacking!" |
• August 22, 2009
The highest recorded jump by a pig was set by Kotetsu, a pot-bellied variety, on this date in 2004. The little guy jumped 27.5 at a farm in Japan and we havent heard from him since. |
• Bubba and Tiny Go on Probation
Two football players, Bubba and Tiny, were taking an important exam. If they failed, they would be on academic probation and not allowed to play in the big game the following week. |
• Watermelon
Three girls named Samantha, Janet and Rebecca were driving through the country, when all of a sudden their car stalls. Samantha remembers seeing a farm a little ways back, so her and Janet walk to the farm, leaving Rebecca guarding the car. |
• Three-Legged Race
One day a traveling salesman was driving down a back country road at about 30 mph when he noticed that there was a three-legged chicken running alongside his car. |
• I'm Very Bullish On Milk
A farmer and a son live on a farm. The farmer is sitting in the kitchen when his son comes in from the barn with a large glass of white liquid. He is so excited because he's just milked a cow. Then he takes a big drink from the glass. His father just stares at him. |
• Mitch Hedberg: OK, You're a Stand-Up Comedian
When you're in Hollywood and you're a comedian, everybody wants you to do things besides comedy. They say, 'OK, you're a stand-up comedian -- can you act? Can you write? Write us a script?'... It's as though if I were a cook and I worked my ass... |
• Victoria Jackson: Macho Husband
My husband's so macho, he has five guns, a helicopter, a motorcycle; he used to be on a SWAT team; and he works the cattle at his mom's farm. So, I thought, he's either really macho, or he's really gay and he's overcompensating. He likes to clean... |
• Shoot The Pig
A farmhand is driving 'round the farm, checking the fences. After a few minutes he radios his boss and says, "Boss, I've got a problem. I hit a pig on the road and he's stuck in the bull-bars of my truck. He's still wriggling — what should I... |
• Office Dictionary
Blamestorming: Sitting around in a group discussing who's to blame for a missed deadline or a failed project. |
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